Tuesday, April 7, 2015

Mini-Van Moms (5 reasons you're cooler than SUV Moms)!

The Headlines:

All Moms say they won't drive a Mini-Van.

Until they do.

Turns out it's not so bad after all.





Lots of little girls grow up thinking they want to, one day, become a Mom.  Many of us have dreams of sweet little angels who lie in their beds looking gorgeous as they sleep, frolicking through the meadows during Summer and enjoying a special Christmas morning with hot cocoa by the fire.

Then reality sets in.  They wake up all the time in the middle of that sweet sleep, there is absolutely no frolicking without someone tripping and hurting themselves and Christmas morning isn't complete unless that hot chocolate spills all over Grandma and gives her 2nd degree burns.  

Yep, reality and dreams sometimes don't always line up.  Especially in motherhood.  Take the car you drive.  When you became a Mom I guarantee, you, along with the rest of us took that pledge.  You know the one, the one that goes:


Feel me?  Now, I know you tried.  You continued to live by that pledge for your first born, maybe even your second but by the time that 3rd one crept in... and definitely your 4th... YOU CAVED.  You had to... it wasn't really a choice anymore.  You bought a Mini-Van.


It was at that point you thought your life was over.  You thought people would make fun of you, you thought it was all down hill from there.  But something else happened.  Other Moms asked you about the Mini-Van, life got easier and somewhere along the line you realized driving a Mini-Van was better than you expected.  A lot better.  

5 reasons driving a Mini-van is cool (er than SUV Moms):


5. No Stress Exits
Whenever SUV Moms get in or out of cars with kids - they're worried.  "Don't open the door to hard!  Watch your fingers.  Don't ding the neighbor!"  The whole process is stressful.  Not for Mini-Van Moms!  Those puppies just slide right open.  Kids can pile in, kids can pile out, none gets hurt, no cars get thrashed.  Everyone's happy and the stress is almost non-existent.  


4. Popular Carpooler  
Really.  I mean, how many does that thing seat?  Like almost a whole baseball team.  WITH CAR SEATS!  I mean I think, technically, it's 8 but everyone's very comfortable in those 8 positions.  In many SUV's, Mom's max out at 4 passengers, especially if they don't have a 3rd row!  Have 2 kids and want to take home 2 more - SORRY - there's no room.  You can take 1 extra friend in the car (if your kids are still too young to sit in the front seat that is...)  Yea, well that's not even close to the entire baseball team Mini-Van Mom can get in there.  SUV Mom is looking mighty boring right about now.

3. There's A Fridge Inside
Maybe not in all, but the ones I've seen have little "cool box"/fridges.  Seriously.  How awesome is that?  Especially if you live somewhere like ARIZONA!  You need one of those in every car here but especially if you have kids.  No crying over spilled or spoiled milk in a Mini-Van.  SUV Moms envy you.

2. Silence is Golden
These cars come fully equipped with the best magic ever.  Televisions. They work wonders, don't they?  They're just better than IPads.  They sit up nice and high.  Everyone can see them.  Nobody fights over holding them.  Turn them on and silence lies over the whole car.  Mom can actually think as she drives.  It's very zen.  Possibly the best thing about these cars.  Period.



And the Number 1 reason driving a Mini-Van is cool.  Drum roll please...

#1 You're a STAR... to anyone under 10
My son wants to travel in "Mini-Cars" any chance he gets.  He thinks it's like rollin' in a Party Bus. To him, Moms who drive Mini-Vans are just cooler people.  An SUV Mom pales in comparison really.  Mini-Van Moms , on the other hand, are like the rock stars of Mom driving.  Katy Perry doesn't hold a candle to the woman in the front seat of the Mini-Van Party Bus - and that my fellow Moms is just cool no matter how you look at it.

So, yes, you could and should continue to recite the Mini-Van pledge in your head as long as you possibly can.  Just know it all may come to a screeching halt at any moment...  


Then... just get it in black... it will make you look thinner!