Wednesday, February 3, 2016

5 things I Say That Make Me Cringe!

The Headlines:

Is there ever something you say out loud...

You wish you could take back?

Here are mine. 

A warning:  this post is going to start light and then go dark real fast.  But give it time... it will come out and leave you in a bright spot again.

Two things this week have reminded me what a charmed life I lead.  Really, if you're reading this... dare I say - what a charmed life WE lead.

I'm heading to Super Bowl 50 this week... #myfirstsuperbowlever (that I'm not working) and I'm really excited about it.  Yea, I'm excited but my husband is thrilled.  Like off the charts.  I wrote a post about my nieces last week who were seen on national television after they were given the ball from the Panthers Player (Ted Ginn Jr.) who scored the 1st touchdown of the game.  You can read HERE if you missed it.  Anyways, since we got the invite to attend the big game I've been running around trying to figure out the details of the weekend.  It's been a little coo-coo.  But in the middle of all the hustle bustle I got a text from my friend that made me put everything down and pause.  She was flying across country this week.  She had to attend a funeral.  You see, her niece just welcomed a beautiful baby into the world.  Like so many of us did during one magical moment.  But as soon as he was given to her he was taken away - he died from infant death syndrome.

He was 3 months old.

And even though many agree he's in a better place... that probably doesn't make his Mother feel any happier today.

So I'm a Mom preparing to go to the Super Bowl and she's a Mom preparing to go to a funeral.   Life just isn't fair.  There's really nothing more to say about that.

But times like this, get me to appreciate, pray, simplify and think.

I hate some of the things I say.  They're so ridiculous and un-worthy especially when you compare them to a mourning Mom.  You know what I mean?  You've done it too.  That time when words came flailing over those lips of yours like a log ride at Disneyland... and if you could stop the splash you would but your already soaked.  That.  Happens to me plenty.  Every time, I think, why?

This post is to get it off my chest and, frankly, to ask forgiveness from the world.

1 - "I feel fat"
You say this I know you do... we're all guilty of it at one point.  For me, it doesn't happen often but when it does, it's annoying.  It all started with my Mom years ago.  That woman was/is tiny!  She would tell people, "I need to gain weight!  I'm too skinny.  I wish were bigger!"  As those words hurled out of her mouth and towards women I could see most of them rebounding, turning into daggers and flinging right back towards her!  You just can't say that and not gain enemies.  I learned from her to keep my mouth shut on that subject.  Still occasionally, like near the monthly time, I  can slip.  Ticks me off.  Because for some the weight issue is deeply personal and a real struggle.  Flippant remarks from someone like me can be incredibly irritating.

2 - "My children are driving me CRAZY!" (or any form of that)
This one I briefly talked about in the fertility series I did last year.  If you're not familiar you can get caught up HERE ... in that post (as well as the 2 others) I talked about how some women, including me, have a hard time getting pregnant.  It can not only be devastating and emotionally draining but it can truly make you feel like less of a woman.  The last thing someone going through that wants to hear are words similar to the ones above.  They think... I would take that drive in a heart beat.

Yes, kids can bug us from time to time.... or maybe daily.  It's a valid and real pain.  But one that's not as excruciating as the alternative.

3 - "I can't wait until..." 
Would you agree too many of us wish our lives away?  I try to enjoy the moments... because all of them are precious.  Even the seemingly mundane ones.  But often I find myself saying "I can't wait until this party is over," "I can't wait until it's Winter Break" or "I can't wait until I get this project done."   Keep waiting for the next big thing and you may miss the big thing you're currently in.  Even if it's just driving the car pool.  Do you know how much good fun and intel comes from those car pools?  I CAN wait for all of it except for the minute I'm in.

4 - "There's nothing to wear!" 
I mean really.  Look at your closet.  I did a blog post on mine... 10 Tips for a DIY Dream Closet  click HERE to read it.   You absolutely have something to wear.  Probably plenty of it.  You may WANT something but do you NEED it?  I bet you don't.

5 - "I have no time!"
Time is infinite.  It's what we choose to do within that time that matters.  I constantly complain about being busy.  But I make my schedule.  I don't have a "job" to go to everyday.  I want to write this blog.  I asked to be room mom.  I choose to sign up my kids for dance, soccer, softball, baseball, spanish and golf.  I throw parties like this fabulous "Savvy Chic" one HERE I recently talked about... I love to remodel and do home projects but I don't have to.  No one's making me head to the Super Bowl this week.  They're all choices.  Fortunate choices I get to make.  So yes the margin in which I live right now lessens even more today.  And that's by my own design.

So bite your tongue self.  Pick and choose words more wisely.  Say what you mean.  Do all those things because it's the right thing to do.  Be prepared to slip.  Then take it back and remember it truly is a blessed life.  I think most of us see that.  It's just important to take a deep breath and remind ourselves from time to time.

This week made me do just that.

Now what about you?  What do you say that makes you cringe?  And maybe the best question yet: what are you going to do about it?

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